Square One. I hate Square One.


I swear.  I knew things were going too well.  Things were going pretty good, I was making progress.  Something had to go wrong.  That’s how my life works.  I get ahead.  I get screwed.  You know what, this time it hurts a little bit more though.  I finally had a job that I liked and a job that provided enough money to afford all of my bills and be able to put a little away for savings.  I had hope.  I don’t know now.

I went into work today in a great mood.  Things were going great.  I had just opened a new savings account this morning, and had deposited my paycheck in there.  So I started by reading my current novel in my car for a few minutes before heading in.  My co-worker walked in and had brought some books for me to read.  So I headed in.  My boss handed me my pay and told me he’d have to let me go.  He claims that he needs two food service certified people in the restaurant at once, and that we’re just not jiving.  So regardless of the fact that I’m pretty good at what I’ve been “trained” on and am willing to work any hours he throws at me, he let me go.  Then I started thinking.  I always thought, as long as one person is food service certified, the restaurant is fine.  Not to mention that he pays me cash, with out having me fill out an independent contractor tax form, I shouldn’t need food service certification.  Who cares that I have almost 7 years of food service experience.  I got fired.

I am not going to lie, I am heartbroken.  I’m not crying simply for the fact that I am too tired to cry anymore.  This job seemed so ideal, he convinced me it would work and I pseudo-quit my other job.  I will most likely NOT get my hours back at Luther Village.  So not only did he dangle the proverbial carrot in front of my face, dangle the chance at hopes and dreams and easier times, he ripped away any current chance I had at surviving financially.

I’ve always trucked through, and I’ve been in much worse positions than this before and I know I’ll make it, I always do.  It’s just finally wearing me down.  I’ve been busting ass for so long, and every time I get a chance to better my life, something goes wrong.  I would give anything to have things go just a tiny bit smoother.  To have one thing, besides my short one, in my life that makes me happy.  I guess I’m just tired of trying so hard.


2 thoughts on “Square One. I hate Square One.

  1. Tracie

    Sarah… I give you mad props for sticking through all the shit you’ve been dealt… I know it’s hard and you’re prolly tired of hearing it but just keep your head up… you WILL get to a point where everything is great and STAYS that way… it’s the shitty journey that sucks. But it WILL happen!!

    Love you <3

  2. Emily

    F***, f***, f***. I always seem to know the best time to abandon the internet for a few days. I’m really speechless, and very sorry. None of which helps. Damn. That guy just seems shady… the whole thing is so very odd. If you’re up to it, give me a call later… hopefully my mind will be somewhat functioning by then. Luvs ya!

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