Quarter Life Crisis

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It’s been brought up in conversation a lot in the past week or so, numerous different friends, most of them my age.  I believe there is such a thing as a Quarter Life Crisis.  However, only a few 20-something experience it…

Sometimes I feel old.  I honest to god forget that I’m in my twenties and get totally caught off gaurd when someone asks my age.  I mean sure, I do things that you’re supposed to do in your twenties, like going to the bar and going dancing, but it’s more or less how it affects me later that makes me feel old.

Things that make me check for gray hair:

-When I was 16 I could get completely shit-faced-omg-drunk, stay up until sunrise, go to work, come home and rinse and repeat.  I was fine.  Now.  I go out for a night of drinking-and-dancing-like-the-white-girl-I-am and I swear to god I feel it for days.  Went out Monday night for instance.  Got home Tuesday Morning-ish.  Felt hungover-ish until… I don’t know… YESTERDAY.  If I don’t get my 8 hours of sleep, or have one too many drinks I’m basically worthless to society and curled in a ball doing absolutely nothing productive.

-I feel old when I wake up in the morning, step onto my porch and think to myself “Man, I really need to pull those weeds.” or “Wow, it’s time to mow the lawn”.  The best is when I glance at my mailbox and wince when I wonder “Did my mortgage bill come yet?  Paydays today”.

– I feel old when the kids at my work (my co-workers) talk about homecoming, graduation, and cerfews.  (I ditched homecoming, missed graduation because I was working, and cerfews – see moved-out-as-a-teenager-and-had-two-jobs).

– I feel old when I have to tell people older than me that I can’t go out for a few rounds because I’m saving my money for -insert random household project- or because I have to work in the morning and want extra hours to pay for -insert random house bill-

– I feel old when I pull up to a stop light, turn down my music so as not to disturb other cars and then curse when the kid next to me is bumping his music and say “What are you? 16?!  Turn that garbage down!” (Kristen… I love you)

– I feel old that while everyone is excited about buying new Ugg boots for fall (those are still popular right??) I’m excited about perfecting my creamy potato soup recipe.

-I feel old when my side of the conversation goes: “Yes I own my own home – Yeah I have a 3 year old – Yup dogs too – No I don’t have a white picket fence and that’s not funny – Yeah divorce is fun – YES I’m 20.

But on the flip side I guess I should add in the things that make me feel younger than I am:

– My crackberry alarm didn’t go off today, I slept until 12:30.  (I sure won’t feel young waking up at 6am to go to work tomorrow after working tonight though lol) I feel like I’m 16.

– When my tables at work card me while I’m serving them their drinks… I’m their bartender

– When someone says the word “buttmunch” or some other equally 5th grade name, I crack up and laugh until I cry

– I meow, bark, grunt, and stick my tongue out at my kid.

– In every ER I have ever visited, I have gotten in trouble for something, usually dancing, usually something along the lines of Thriller or the Robot.

– having an entire kiosk at the mall put money on the idea that I was 17 ( 6 years younger than I was )

– wearing striped toe socks…. to work… then showing my boss.

I guess it goes both ways.  I’m off to finish my coffee.

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