Strawberry Ale

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Saturday night, day one of a much needed three day weekend.  Monday, I am off work… initially it was out of necessity.  It’s Columbus Day (aka: lets-celebrate-genocide-day), so the kid doesn’t have school… and on the major school holidays, daycare is closed.  So I requested the day off, because being myself, I don’t have many other options for childcare.

Either way, as the days counted down to this weekend, work got more and more stressful.  Each day that inched by, the more depressed I got.  The more anxious, the more upset.  It’s just been… hellish, especially after working late nights for god knows how long.  Friday, I lost it.  I finally found out what burnt out feels like, I thought I had experienced it before, but quite honestly I hadn’t.  Every little thing was setting me off into tears, I felt like I was on the borderline of an anxiety attack all day.  (Hello, new prescription.)  It was one of those days where I had to go outside, and solidly convince myself that deep down I *do* like my job, and that while my paycheck is no longer 100% needed, I like having that income.

It was bound to happen.  I knew it was coming, and quite frankly, I’m surprised it came with tears instead of screaming and storming out.  Friday straight up blew.  However though, when I’m stressed I tend to say what I mean, instead of sugar coating it, so I got some of my thoughts off my chest.  Despite the tears, at the end of the day, I actually felt better.  On the drive home, I thought about what I wanted out of life, out of work and out of my home.  I put some priorities in order, and let me just tell you this: my family comes first.  Hearing my boyfriends views on it, and knowing I have his support regardless of what I do with work helps.

Cue: Weight off my shoulders.

So, this weekend, I’m taking for my family.  This Monday is a Noodle+Me day.  I’m enjoying every minute of it.  I know that I have some work I really should get to, especially with corporate coming in next week.  This weekend though?  I’m not doing it.  I’m not checking emails, faxes, lates or anything.  I need this, and I need time.

Today wasn’t quite fun filled with the morning dentist appointment, but watching scary movies with the short one this afternoon was nice.  Right now, I’m relaxing with a Strawberry Ale (mighty tasty I might add) and writing.. while fending off complaints from the child that she lost her charger for her tablet.  Tomorrow?  I don’t know what’s going on, but I know I’m spending my morning in bed until I feel ready to get up… and the day?  Relaxing.  Monday?  I think a bike ride with the kid, and lunch out.

Moral of the last week (year)… family and self comes first.

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