High Risk & Losing Respect for Friends and Family

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The pandemic has done weird things to people and battered or broke relationships of all sorts. I know I for one have lost touch with family members and friends, and in a strange way, I am glad for it.

I don’t even know what month we’re technically on. It’s gotten to the point where the monotony of semi-isolation is blending my days together. I stay isolated because of the medications I am on, and I keep my daughter mostly isolated as she has asthma. I don’t really go to stores or anything like that, although I do visit a friend of mine, because staying in the house 24/7 surprisingly is a lot more drastic than 24/6 (rough estimate lol).

My point being is that I don’t go out to the bars, I don’t go shopping, I don’t travel to see my family (for multiple reasons now), and I don’t really do much outside of my home. Thankfully my job is remote, so that’s one less thing to worry about.

I didn’t really have a lot friends, nor a want to go out barhopping or anything like that pre-pandemic, so to be completely honest, short of losing date nights, my life hasn’t changed that drastically. The changes that I have endured though have been heart breaking.

I have lost friends, or acquaintances purely because they refuse to wear a mask, or social distance, or the worst? Make comments like “only the sick and weak die, it’s not a big deal”. You don’t have to wear a mask or social distance because our shit-show of a government says so, you should be doing it because it saves the lives of many people.. people like myself and my kid. I’ve slowly weeded people out of my life, because of above opinions, and some of those people included my family.

I’m also grappling with not seeing my immediate family this year. I know my parents traveled early on in the pandemic, (I haven’t inquired about recent travels) and buying into conspiracy theories. Supposedly they wear masks now, but socially distancing isn’t a thing for them. I was invited to spend Thanksgiving with them, but my siblings would be traveling (by plane too) to see them. Masks are not always enough, and that’s too much of a risk for me to take. Not to mention that I don’t condone traveling during this pandemic, even if it was to see my parents and sister, whom I miss. I’m high risk, I can’t do that, and most importantly I can’t risk giving the virus to anyone else as I’m also not perfect. Double-Unfortunate, I worked all around Thanksgiving, because: Black Friday & new job. So I guess it didn’t matter anyway.

I think finding out that people whom you care about, don’t care enough about you (and everyone else) to protect themselves and stay at home has been the most painful part of this pandemic. I’m still processing everyone I’ve pulled away from, and I don’t know when I’ll get over it to be honest.